Helping your teen survive the summer

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Smells like teen summer depression? Here are ways to identify and support your teen through the hottest months of the year, while keeping yourself and your family mentally strong

Now that summer is right around the corner, some of us cannot wait for school vacation, excited to spend more time with friends and family of all ages. But with the fun also come many hours that would need to be filled with activities. Too many hours of boredom, FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and downtime have the potential to truly bring any person down, even when the sun is up.

Though teenagers often experience mood changes, in the summer you might notice your teen struggling with more extreme mood changes and behaviors. Summertime depression can sneak up on teenagers as they struggle with less structure, lack of daily physical exercise, less stimulation and academical challenges, FOMO, extra time on social media and screens, and feeling purposeless all around. It is also not uncommon for teen friend-groups to shift as the summer progresses, leaving them lost and confused.

What are some red flags?

While you remember to check in and utilize self-compassion with yourself, take a moment to check in with your teen for signs that they may be feeling depressed or anxious. Though in many ways similar to the famous winter SAD, summer depression does vary slightly in its symptoms and may include: 

• Experiencing feelings of sadness

• Insomnia

• Weight loss

• Lack of appetite

• Agitation or anxiety

• Episodes of violent behavior

These symptoms might be alleviated by returning to school, socializing and a routine. However, if your teen’s symptoms do not resolve within two weeks of returning to school, or if they show signs of summer depression two seasons in a row, it is a good idea to make an appointment for them or your family with a mental health professional.

Is there anything you can do?

There always is something that a well-meaning, intentional, caring parent can do. As you head into summer with your family enjoy the sun, indulge in crisp watermelon and tomatoes, spend time outdoors, but most of all, soak in the special time with the people in your life that you love. Keep in mind that all of these changes might affect different teens in different ways, and be intentional about exploring collaborative ways to keep them healthy and happy during the transition. Here are a few things to remember:

Balance freedom with structure

Give tweens/teens freedom as well as a bit of structure: Let them run around with their friends, but also balance that with a daily responsibility to the family and household, such as emptying the dishwasher, walking the dog or sweeping the porch.

Do not over-schedule

Do book your tweens/teens into camps, but don’t fill every moment after camp with activities. Tweens/Teens need time to be bored. Boredom is uncomfortable at first but has a way of inducing creativity and resourcefulness.

Get off screens and go outdoors

Tweens and teens are spending so much time indoors and on screens, and it is important to remember that spending time outdoors can have a huge impact on improving mental health. If you are short of time, remember that even a simple walk can reduce stress and anxiety. Other summer activities can include hiking, building a fort, canoeing, roller blading, picnicking, stargazing, swimming or just reading books together under a tree. And if you really need it, don’t forget Pokemon Go!

Plan some family time

A core need for tweens and teens is to feel valued and appreciated. The best way to do this is by spending quality time with them. Plan some intentional activities like cooking and eating dinner as a family, trying out an activity that they love (like their favorite video game) or getting creative and decorating a room together. Take a moment to appreciate their input and thank them. This will build your connection at a time in life when they are spending more time with friends.

Check in about more than when they will next be home

Ask about friendships, Tiktok, music and dates. A good rule of thumb is to ask these question casually, when you are engaged in another activity like washing the car, walking the dog, or going shopping. This keeps the pressure off them, and the conversation more lighthearted and caring.

It can be quite challenging to keep up with a teen when you are working full-time and have a life of your own. It might be difficult to slow down and check-in with yourself, let alone your kids, a partner, your pets and friends. Make sure to take care of yourself and model self-compassion in moments of overwhelm or frustration, and the people around you will be sure to follow your lead.

Our therapists at GTWC are here to help as well- contact intake@gracecft.com to be matched with a therapist who can support you through SAD.